Waiter’s Retirement Program

I contribute to the Waiter’s Retirement Program between 1 and 4 times per week. Hey, you have to if you ever expect to enjoy your golden years with anything better than Social Security.

What are the benefits? Well, right now, the payout is expected to be $207 million. And the next drawing is Friday.

The Lotto (in California there are two games: Mega Millions and Super Lotto) captures the imagination of millions. You don’t have to be a waiter. But wherever I’ve worked, the mere mention of a big jackpot triggers a collection and a group purchase. So everybody can retire.

I’m the optimistic dreamer-type. I fantasize about what I’ll do, what I’ll spend money on, what problems I’ll be free from, what I can do for my loved ones . . .

The other is the doubting, fearful, risk management-type. They wouldn’t normally play, but there’s no F’n’ way they are willing to risk that everybody else might win and they would be left holding down our shifts.

$207 million. I’m going to need it. I’m sorry to report that lunch business at Michael’s has been very poor. Certainly by now we would normally have been getting our fair share of Christmas parties. Instead, the last three days have actually been even slower than usual – forget about a bump up. I was off Monday, cut before I left home on Tuesday, and cut today after I got to work. To be fair, I could have stayed today if I had liked, but when I arrived at noon, there was only one deuce seated. Twenty minutes later, still only the same deuce. The reservations promised only another ten covers, and the opening servers hadn’t even ‘gotten theirs’ yet. That would have left me waiting probably another hour for my covers – which might never come at all.

I do know, however, that Friday will be strong. And the following week is definitely already booked up. Also, last week at Carney’s was pretty solid – and I worked two extra shifts – so that helps.

Still, the economy is a scary thing right now.

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